Words from Ashes

I started a new blog for my poetry: http://wordsfromashes.blogspot.com/
I wanted a separate place for all my poetry and I want this blog to be more focused on my desire to serve God as a missionary.  I deleted a lot of my meaningless posts and the poetry (which is now all on Words from Ashes).  I will be giving this blog yet another makeover, however, I will be keeping the name the same for the time being.  I wanted to keep some things that were already on the blog, and this makes it easier.  Besides that, Blog2b still serves its purpose and I expect that once I start college I will be starting a new blog.  That's all for now.

Prayer Request

I have a quick prayer request. Lately I was listening to an interview Alex and Brett Harris did on Focus on the Family a few years ago to refocus my life and remind myself how to do hard things. They spoke a little about the three pillars: character, competence and collaboration.

"A lot of times we need the humility to say I can’t do everything, I need to bring other people on my team and if this is really a vision with getting excited about, and this is really something too big to be accomplished alone, I need to be able to bring other people on my team."

I’ve been listening with my ESL project at my high school in mind and also my future as a missionary as well. As for the ESL project, I was working with a girl last year but the bulk of the project fell on me, and I was okay with that, I wanted it that way really. But she graduated and I know that I was falling short on my responsibilities. So I’m praying for God to show me someone who will be interested in coming alongside me with this project, and also for the humility to accept that person’s help. So if you could just remember me over the course of the semester, I’d appreciate it.

Piano Hands

I just had to share this picture.  I was practicing piano the other day and one of my mom's daycare kids came downstairs and watched.  I asked him if he wanted to sit with me so he climbed up on the bench.  I asked him if he wanted to try so he started playing.  It was so cute; he would turn the pages of the music and try to imitate me.  I love this picture of his hands on my piano.

How do we Do Hard Things when we're weary?

Many of you know that I am working on an ESL project for my Girl Scout Gold Award. I'm organizing a club for students in my high school who are interested in tutoring and teaching English as a Second Language to students in our school whose first language is not English. It's been going pretty good as far as the total outcome goes but I'm exhausted. Around every corner is some discouragement; unreturned emails and phone calls that completely derail a whole aspect of the project, harsh words from people who mean well in critiquing but seem to not consider the impact, clashing opinions from people I care about, and worst, the utter ignorance of my peers. I'm ashamed to admit that I am tired of explaining my project to my friends. I'm tired of working on this is school for it and being asked what they're for and trying to explain that it's a club for teaching ESL and explaining what ESL is and why I want to do it. Then when I'm done and they finally understand the thing I was trying to do never got done and they just look at me funny and roll their eyes. The bubble of ignorance I live in is wearing me down. No one seems to understand why this is a problem, no one seems to want to help fix the language barriers and no one seems to care. When people ask I just give the short answer now; "it's for a friend, I'm editing it." "it's for an after-school club." "its for a kid i tutor" I've done this before. With WIFD and the Rebelution i get tired of explaining so I just say it's a Christian blog or a church thing. If you tell a 10th grader that The Rebelution is "a rebellion against low expectations of an un-Godly culture" all you're going to get is laughed at or a blank expression. "church thing" conveys all they're gonna get out of it so much better. But I feel guilty doing this because I know it's wrong and I know I should make more of an effort. But it's just so tiring.

I guess all we can do is pray for God to work through us and give us the strength to carry on His Name and His Plan, no matter the strange looks or laughter and taunting. In the end it will all be Right. And that's all we need to know to go on.

Stress and Worry

So I know the Bible says not to worry in multiple places. I've always taken that to mean to not stress over things, to leave it to God and trust that He knows what He's doing. And that's a part of it. Now when I decided I needed to live like a better Christian this was one of the areas I knew needed to be addressed. I had no trouble really giving up the stress. I was really surprised how easy God lifted the burden from me. However, I haven't been able to let go of worry. It's not obsessive worry or stressful worry, it's just worry about sad things that happen to people I suppose. Things beyond my control that I feel sorry about and worry. I'm not explaining this well, I'm too tired I think. Do you get the idea though? I feel like the worry isn't a problem, it's just feeling sympathy for others. The stress is what's bad. But I'm not sure.. Thoughts?

Jesus Christ and the American G.I.

I received this email a few weeks ago and found it very powerful so I'll pass it along this way too.

PICTURE OF THE YEAR
Wearing certain colors for recognition of different causes, Why Not for this?
Everyone wear blue Friday. Please read below:

WILL YOU WEAR BLUE???
International Picture of the Year
Here are two very touching photos honored this year
First Place:

Todd Heisler, The Rocky Mountain News
When 2nd Lt. James Cathey's body arrived at the Reno Airport , Marines climbed into the cargo hold of the plane and draped the flag over his casket as passengers watched the family gather on the tarmac. During the arrival of another Marine's casket last year at Denver International Airport , Major Steve Beck described the scene as so powerful: 'See the people in the windows? They sat right there in the plane, watching those Marines. You gotta wonder what's going through their minds, knowing that they're on the plane that brought him home,' he said 'They will remember being on that plane for the rest of their lives. They're going to remember bringing that Marine home, And they should!'

Second Place:

Todd Heisler, The Rocky Mountain News
The night before the burial of her husband's body, Katherine Cathey refused to leave the casket, asking to sleep next to his body for the last time. The Marines made a bed for her, tucking in the sheets below the flag. Before she fell asleep, she opened her laptop computer and played songs that reminded her of 'Cat,' and one of the Marines asked if she wanted them to continue standing watch as she slept. 'I think it would be kind of nice if you kept doing it,' she said. 'I think that's what he would have wanted.'
Please keep this going…
Blue Fridays.
Very soon, you will see a great many people wearing blue every Friday. The reason? Americans who support our troops used to be called the 'silent majority' We are no longer silent, and are voicing our love for God, country and home in record breaking numbers We are not organized, boisterous or overbearing. Many Americans, like you, me and all our friends, simply want to recognize that the vast majority of America supports our troops. Our idea of showing solidarity and support for our troops with dignity and respect starts this Friday -- and continues each and every Friday until the troops all come home, sending a deafening message that every red-blooded American who supports our men and women afar, will wear something blue. By word of mouth, press, TV -- let ' s make the United States on every Friday a sea of blue much like a homecoming football game in the bleachers. If every one of us who loves this country will share this with acquaintances, coworkers, friends, and family, it will not be long before the USA is covered in BLUE and it will let our troops know the once 'silent' majority is on their side more than ever, certainly more than the media lets on. The first thing a soldier says when asked 'What can we do to make things better for you? 'is.' We need your support and your prayers. ' Let's get the word out and lead with class and dignity, by example, and wear something blue every Friday.

Only two defining forces have ever offered to die for you:
1. Jesus Christ
2. The American G. I.
One died for your soul, the other for your freedom.

YOU MIGHT WANT TO PASS THIS ON,
AS MANY SEEM TO FORGET BOTH OF THEM.

My Baby

So I made this video of my baby, Sugar cause I wanted to do something with all the pictures I had of him on my laptop. So hopefully y'all can see it and it works...